Last night as I lay down to sleep you jumped out and grabbed me again.
Where do you hide? You hide in my dresser drawer. You hide in my kitchen cabinet. You hide in my back yard. You hide in so many large and tiny spaces but mostly you hide in my heart.
Mr. Grief, Mr. Pain, Mr. Lost and Lonely, you have so many names and so many hiding places. You even hide in my mind. A thought, a bent fork, a stray sock, just about anything allows you to attack me over and over again.
It feels like sadness unrelenting, pain never ending, and so much emptiness. My arms are empty of his body, my nose of his scent, my eyes of his sight, my life of his presence.
I knew we balanced each other. I knew how much I depended on him.
I am not a weak person. I am strong and capable. But you make me feel tiny and weak.
When will you leave me alone?
As my life evolves I find the need to present this blog in a new light. It is about all life experiences since I'm living without my husband of more than a quarter century. This blog is about me, my life, thoughts, ramblings and experiences plus those of people with whom I share life. Join us. Your insights could be very helpful.
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this brought tears to my eyes...i just want to give you a big Ol Hug!
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